Monday in NJ

Hello everyone...sorry for the sporadic updates the past week or so, but with the travel schedule over the last week, I haven't had time to sit a collect my thoughts long enough to sit and type anything coherent.

Anyway, poker has been a drag lately....reloaded my last $200 in profits on Sat and promptly doubled it Sat morning, so I thought I was back in the swing of things...then between Sat evening waiting for the guys to show up and Sunday evening, I promptly gave it all back....so I'm sitting at about $50 on UB and that's it....going to try and avoid playing from the hotel room for the next couple of nights and get my head back on straight...watched myself go on major tilt last night...playing each hand like a crazy man and just giving away my last $100...was sad to see, as I normally recognioze tilt and have the discipline to stop playing, but I was in a very bad mood last night after talking to my dad and just didn't give a damn about the poker....which is a very bad recipe for playing effective poker. So...lesson learned...

As I mentioned, last night pretty much sucked after talking to my dad....as some of you gusy know, my folks have decided to seperate after 40 years of marriage and I am just not dealing well with it....strange, I'm 36, and you would think I could deal with this better. jen and I talked last night about it, and she confessed that she has seen the change in me, especially after I talk to my Dad and get all the gory details of the current state of affairs between he and mom....I haven't slept well since before Christmas and I tend to have a much shorter fuse the normal, especially when dealing with Danielle and Ashley....not that I have that much of a temper, but I tend to be very short on the patience and less able to deal with the needs of the two little ones...I guess hearing that Jen sees it and I admitted to it (as well as typing it here) is helping me confront the issue to some degree....we'll see.

I guess the real issue at this point is to have it out with my mom....as she really seems to be pushing the envelope of fairness in her dealings with dad and the devision of their assets...not to mention that she has avoided discussing any of the details from the last 6 months with me leaves me pretty indifferent to her plight...given that she has shown little remorse for moving back to PA and has apparently found someone new there, her treatment of dad and the rest of the family has been pretty dreadful. I'm probably going to giver her a call tonight and try to discuss these issues, as I can't have them effecting my life like this anymore....wish me luck.

Enough of this....hope everyone is happy and healthy....later.